I've currently been busy really in a number of different ways.
My school for one has been completely time consuming which is what College is suppose to be as I hear. I'm okay with that for the most part, nothing that I'm coming up against is anything I can't handle per say but it still pretty tough.
I've also been 'dating' more than one person. Okay here is the thing about me, for some reason when it comes to 'relationship' sort of attention I can not seem to get enough of it. Not in the immature sort of attention, but it comes from being bombarded from multiple areas and not being able to slow down and say 'I'm sorry I currently have way too much on my plate now and am sort of dating someone else'.
Can I pull the foster kid card? I wasn't loved enough? I wouldn't dare.
So you know about the mature banker guy I've been seeing lately. Everything in that respect is going amazingly, he's a nice down to earth guy who is always...so nice. My first logical reaction would be to stick by him, its something completely stable and I should be happy with what I have.
I'm not, not in the least.
I enjoy a certain amount of trouble.
In the same way married men sometimes wish they had a that metaphorically 'bad' wife.
Its sick let me tell you what. For one if I didn't have enough complication in my life I bring another person on board to enjoy the ride.
He's a 16 year old skater guy that is into the tall footballer type.
(Thought I would also mention that its completely legal in my state for another 9 days).
Which if I hadn't said enough times I fit that stereotype perfectly.
He happens to be about 5'4 and hundred and fifteen pounds. Exactly my type. Tight black pants band t-shirt skater guy. Its cute.
Its funny because the other night we were making out like a bunch of high schoolers would (ick I know you don't wanna hear about it but its important to my point). He's naming off all the things he likes about me and I'm noticing its everything I don't like about myself. Then I go onto mention everything I like about him and its the same way. He hates that he's small and scrawny...I like that...I hate being tall and built.
Nice right?
Dysfunctional maybe and the whole situation could get me in some serious trouble if I'm not careful.
But I like it. The idea of getting in trouble is sort of appealing to me, in that area anyway.
Plus he's completely random in every sort of way. Following my thought process perfectly.
He calls me up at 12:30 Saturday night and wants me to come pick him up so we can 'hangout' which is code for...well you know.
“OH look a burger king, I'm thirsty lets stop!”
2 hours later we are sitting in the church parking lot we decided to park to 'hangout'. Its past his bed time and I have to pry him off me to take him home.
Now if that isn't gaining back some of those years stuck in foster care not being able to make out with the boys I wanted too...I dunno what will.
Here in about an hour I'm heading over to his house to 'hangout' before his mother gets home from work.
If anyone has any thoughts on this situation I am very open to input at this point.
10 comments:
You know, I'm thinking a couple of things. First, that I shouldn't read your blog at work when I am killing time waiting for a student because it might make me blush or laugh and I don't want to explain why.
Second, I am thinking... I don't know ... maybe that I am glad you have the whole world to talk to about these things now?
Nine days...enjoy them dear.
I wouldn't worry though -- what's the chance the relationship will last more than nine days? :0
Ouch.
Your just mad you don't get to make out in a church parking lot.
<3
There's something just completely sick and wrong about "making out" (or whatever else you were doing) in a church parking lot.
As for the dating multiple people thing, if you are going to do that, you owe it to the people that you are dating to tell them that you are not being exclusive.
I dunno, I guess I'm just old-fashioned and I believe in monogamy (or at least serial monogamy) and not screwing everything that moves.
Of course I'm not male, either.
It was a Church of God.
I do not have any problem with using a safe place like a church parking lot.
Someone once told me that you're exactly where you are meant to be because your there.
God wanted me in that parking lot by golly.
lolz.
As long as you are being honest and safe, I don't see a problem with you experiencing some things. But you should be honest with both guys if you aren't going to be exclusive. It's only fair.
The church parking lot thing cracked me up.
Be honest and especially be safe!
Wonder what the Pastor would say about the use of the paeking lot...LOL
Peace,
Larry~
some points:
1 be safe
2 you are having way more fun then marvin the paranoid android (and that's good).
3 I am very happy my son is only five
4 in 9 days the world might have ended anyway
5 for point 5 you can reread fosterabba's
5
I just like you. Good for you for getting some life going. Not life like I have to do X because of Y, but life like LIFE! LIFE!
I'm with everyone else that you should be safe and fair and let the people know, but for pete's sake you're young and in college and should be with people who like you. Particularly for reasons that you don't like yourself.
I like you. I'm enjoying reading your blog.
Tell the banker that you're not exclusive, but then go for it.
LIFE!
Hi!
I second what others have said. Be safe, there's no such thing as being too safe specially if you're dating more than 1 person at a time. And be honest with the guys you're dating, it avoids future misunderstandings and disappointments on their behalf, and they deserve to know.
I'm a few years older than you are, and a college student -still, and quite frankly don't understand why you're dating a 17 year-old guy!! Where I'm from, dating highschoolers (that's under 18) is not fine when you're 19 or over. But then, you don't live here so...enjoy while it lasts!!
Practically speaking, I have to agree with yondalla here- I was just about to say "dude, not in a church parking lot!!!" when I realized I'd have to explain to my kids what I was talking about.
I think not.
But then I read its just a "church of God", so apparently that's ok? I'm lost. They don't have churhc of God here.
But on to the real issue- isnt' it possible that you KNOW with your mind that the banker man would be a "good choice" (ie, one you could take places, depend on, bring home to yondalla, etc) but that you just don't "click" with him? Logically he's a great choice, but maybe either you're not ready for long term relationships/commitment/babies/dog/house note?
And maybe at the same time that you realize you aren't ready to be an "adult", you're seeing your youth fly by? So you're seeking out someone that makes you feel young, because that recreates the feelings you want to hang on to?
Maybe its better to just be honest and tell both of them you're not exclusive, that you just want to be friends (albeit friends w/priviliges for skater boy apparently ha ha).
Honesty & safety first. You're still so young- I wouldn't be looking to settle down just yet. You have to know who you are, and find something that has strengths for your weaknesses and vice versa.
Not just someone that pays your bills or picks up the tab
OR
who flips your switch, so to speak.
Honesty & safety. And don't get the police called on you for making out with your jailbait b-friend in a freaking church parking lot.
Because if I see that on CNN I swear I'm calling Yondalla and tattling on you!
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